WHICH of these dilemmas do you often catch yourself doing? Being haunted by the past
where we see ourselves as victims of negative events or being frozen by the thought of the future which we fear and have no control over?
In understanding stress, it is not just the stressor or our response that are important but how we process and perceive things. Both the actual day to day situation and the common issues we entertain from our mind can give tensions to us.
The two things that usually trigger negative responses in our feelings are the negative experiences from the past and the future things that we are afraid to confront — things that may happen to us or to our loved ones.
With the negative experiences from the past, we sometimes relive, recycle and engage with
them to the point of relating them to our present situation.
For example, if you are bullied before and it left a significant mark on your security as a person, it can continually affect you by not easily trusting anybody whom you thought has the same qualities of the ones who bullied you.
Not being able to fight back and stand for yourself can produce a sense of looking at yourself as a weakling. The situation may be from the past but if you keep on romanticizing failures, self criticism and unfavorable experiences, their teeth will surely bite our serenity.
Another thing that may cloud our thoughts are the possible future events that we are afraid to confront head on. These are unpleasant or difficult situations that may be hard to overcome. We worry about these things and they usually sap our energy just the thought of them.
We worry about small details, like if the person next to us in public transport will harm us. Small thing like this may least to happen but if we keep thinking about what negative things could come up, then the fright will creep in that will make us froze.
Why do we keep doing this, exploiting our very own minds? Is it because we want to prove we take control of our lives? And it is empowering to know that we are in charge and we can stand our ground in any battle we are fighting.
But come to think of it, do we really have control over the things of the past and the things that are about to happen in the future?
For some, being prepared for the future may give them that sense of control. But we must face the reality that there are things in life that are beyond our control.
To relieve this kind of stress, it is important to be grounded in the present. To live the present is the only thing we can savor and work out our tranquility. If the past is over, let this be over. The present is a gift we can cherish. Make a good and sound decision with it.
The Bible also teaches us to focus on the present. Jesus spoke about it in Matthew 6:34 when he said “So do not worry about tomorrow; it will have enough worries of its own. There is no need to add to the troubles each day brings.”(The Bible, GNT)
These words will give us wisdom not to overburden ourselves with what we cannot handle. Learn to be grounded in the present with our anchor attached to God in faith as the Word of God says: “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all
understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:6-7, The Bible NIV)
Grounded and anchored
